Sad

*Note* This is not a humorous post nor is it a request for insincere comments. It's just straight up raw feelings, read at your own risk

Today has been a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. Why? Just because, because I feel like no one cares and I am reliving all the times people have let me down, especially when I got up the nerve to ask for help.

Once I asked some people to visit my Mom while she was in the hospital since I wasn't allowed to bring the children and needed a break from being the only care giver of hers. When asked if I need someone to babysit so I could visit I said No, but I needed someone else to show Mom they cared, Didn't happen.

Last pregnancy I was stressed out and could have used a shoulder to cry on or talk or something. I spoke to one friend who mentioned someone else was just saying they were concerned. Nice to know they could talk to each other about me but not actually come to console me.

When it was time for Dan to be born I asked the R.S if anyone might be available to help with Ben & Tom and if so please let me know, no one called, I ended up asking the R.S. President to come over and help my Mom get the kids to bed the night we went into the hospital. Luckily my sister-in-law was able to take them the next day (good thing it was a holiday). I do want to say thanks to Maria, who visited in the hospital, Lurlene, on her own no R.S. coordination, brought a dinner, and all who gave gifts.

Then I was "invited" to a joint baby shower for me (baby already born)and another friend, whose baby had not come yet. If it was for me, even in part why was it the co-guest of honor(in truth the real guest of Honor) who told me about it? I really wish I would have sent my regrets for that one, talk about feeling like the red-headed step child. I was grateful to see some people who wished me well and the gifts were nice.

I guess the lesson I need to learn is 2 fold. 1st Remember this pain and disappointment and try to relieve someone else's loneliness. 2nd, I really do have a few people that will help when they can. Even if most of my "friends" who could help don't or say the would but don't speak up and make me come to them.